Oppresive clouds of loniless

El Bonillo, 31 Oct. 2012.

The blood red eye in the sky, almost like the eye of God, watching my endeavours trying to keep this bike in motion and getting closer to the coast every day, trying harder even to ignore my Soledad, the ever growing sense of loneliness which by now, nearly four weeks of cycling  , though I have to admit I have lost track of time, one day gliding into the next, is becoming synonimous with the stygian depths of self chosen hell...

I don´t remember from previous cycle trips, long hikes in forgotten forests and sea kayaking, sleeping on solidary sandy beaches somewhere on Asian beaches under an opaque moon after wolfing down tons of food, feeling these oppresive clouds of loneliness attacking me with such an overwelming ethereal reality...

My pitiful atrphied human spirit, my frenetic soul, willing my body to keep pushing the pedals of my bike,  inwardly counting down the days to the end of this trip but completely out of sync with time, trying hard to conclude this disparate purpose of being alone, away from the hustle and bustle of good old Mokum but longing for the entertainment of Pattaya where I never can possibly be alone, never possibly could be suffering from this omni-presence of utter mental desolation...

Trying to create entertainment for myself evening after evening in front of my tent, drawing countless nude Hot Mommas in the flickering lights of my small camp fire, moels who could have been there in the flesh if I had been more intelligent and bought that ticket to Krung Thep, as the Thais call their sweltering capital, and got myself on that local bus straight from Bankok´s new airport Suvarnibhumi, ninety minutes of easy transportation to that male paradise called Pattaya...

But no...I had to create a totally different sort of entertainment, but a Kross bicycle and test myself one more time, physically as well as mentally, to my very limits...cycling every darned day in the very midst of nowhere...

Still the coast is getting closer and with it Barcelona, my bus back to Amsterdam and a cheap ticket back to my second home called The Land Of Smiles...