Adiction problems, still...

Amsterdam, 04-02-2008. Rob got his bicycle back!!! I saw him last week and he was fuming hell and beyond about Richard The Little Shit who had borrowed his bike and never brought the bloody thing back, reminds me of the cell phone thing I had with that Little Shit some weeks ago....not that I care much...Saw Rob again today and all in a good mood he told me he got his bike back. Richard probably thought "hey Shiva can kick hard but Rob can kick even harder!!!". I had a beer together with Rob in his house and the half smoked sigar on his table just freaked me out, amazing that after having been clean on the smoking department, a simple three quarters smoked butt of a sigar can still do such a strong job on me, can still bring this whole adiiction problem all the way back, can still get me back into this street life of losers, this life of Westerpark drunks, this brotherhood of professional drunks that do nada all day but drink King Alcohol, smoke dope and coke and quarrel all the time over the dough to finance all this crap....just how come I can sit there in that junk house, see that sigar butt on Rob`s table and feel that attraction coming back so strong, almost like it never was away at all....after all the good things I`ve been doing off late, the healthy jogging in the park, my volunteer job at the animal farm, SHIT I even became a member of the public library and have been doing great on the internet with my travel stories on reisprofiel.nl - over 600 hits in a few days and that on such a small site!!! - Well, I managed to leave that sigar butt where it belonged, hAd only one beer, rest and relax a bit in the house and even went jogging once my body had gotten rid of that beer.