Miss Endu

Holland, Amsterdam,
30-04-2010.

I met miss Endu on Pattaya's boulevard where I made this sketch of her. The little frog in the right hand corner was a bit of a joke disturbing her while she was posing for me.

In the course of my stay in Pattaya we became close friends often having coffee together early morning and she coming over to my room for a shower during hot afternoons with no customers, wanting to watch some telly when crazy Farangs were absent on her working location, Pattaya's boulevard.

A schizophrenic zone of complete nuttiness

Holland, Amsterdam,
30-04-2010.

My thoughts are still ruled by my Thai Hot Mommas, stupid uneducated Isan peasant-turned-whores to some who will quite willingly spread their legs to any fat-bellied Khee Mau Farang carrying a fat wallet and horny to the max. Yeah a deep depression is setting in here in my crazy alcohol-destroyed mind, a one way first class ticket to mental hell and beyond, entering a mental schizophrenic zone of complete nuttiness, fear for what I have done to my inmortal soul...the Thai concept of Kharma, carrying your sins to your next rebirth or as the English saying goes "What Goes Around Comes Around".

Today is a rainy and chilling Dutch Queen's Day but I left the house anyway, happy to be away from the female Thai spirits that rule the lonely and self-chosen solitude of my excistence, knowing that on a normal day my time at the Anne Frank House selling my games will at least keep my mind free of worries and a crazy Guilt Complex brought about by my numerous contacts with these poor creatures of the night...however nowadays they seem to follow me to every corner of Amsterdam, hiding in the misty outback of my gray brain mass, coming to the front whenever they feel like it, mental torment and a array of in-skull screamed accusations seem to be their tools for a strange revenge...

Poor Moo on her stupid beach chair looking at me with glaced over eyes that carry the imminent arrival of Death coming back and back in detailed images, Ohn's messy death just a day before my arrival to Pattaya...all of it having been pushed to the more darker and dustier parts of my Farang mind coming back with unbelievable clarity...other female contacts from ages ago make an unexpected appearance with the speed of a flash of lightning...

I paint naked Thai women with a crazy determination, feeling like a monk in a praying cubicle and surrounded by cans of acrylic paint, surrounded by my artwork, like being obsessed...

I work like a mad man at the animal farm for children, my volunteer job that requires hard work for hardly any pay but is supposed to improve my Kharma, my mind set on my part of the daily work, totally oblivious to the visitors that normally I always have a friendly little chat for, like a mad men obsessed with his chores...

I really have to seriously ponder on a new destination for my next trips considering the impact of Thai Isan females have on my fucked-up mind, personal involvement to the max I would name this dilemma I seem to have entered...

Tuk from Pattaya

Tuk again...painted in my house in here in Amsterdam from one of the many photos I made of her last march in Thailand, Pattaya...I have pics on several other Hot Momma models from my latest trip to Thailand but Tuk really was my favorite.

The roles of male and female

Holland, Amsterdam,
26-04-2010.

My artwork is devoid of any financial gain, just a lot of work making it and even more work uploading it to the Sacred Internet, a world-wide gallery free of charge, open to a world-wide public. To hell and beyond what the world might think, opine and insult what comes out of my alcohol destroyed gray brain mass.

An expensive joint to stimulate neurons ruling the artistic part of my crazy mental processes, a river of Mekhong Thai whiskey to get myself to that other realm where everything looks benign but colorfull, where everything is in favor of me, peacefull and not opposing my life style and my actions, glamoring my artistic abilities...

It is one of these days where I wake up alone in my house after a whole night of boozing downtown in various tourist bars looking for female backpackers from the other side of Mother Earth, travelling ladies willing to meet local men the way the Hot Mommas in Thailand were mere weeks ago but inside my head already a life time away from present time...

Some young chick from The States or a plain blond from Skandinavia to help me through my lonely nights here in my house in Amsterdam, or spend the night in their hotel room for all I care..just plain and simple a female body in the bed to wake up to...

But no, I wake up alone in my house, a splitting head ache telling me that last glass of RED WINE - or was it a whole bottle? - was the one that did me in...no female warm body, no soft snoring, a slight push during the night when the lady in question turns to her other side, no nail polished hand groping for my malehood, the owner hoping for sex before breakfast...

Instead I spend the better part of the day nursing my hangover, no Anne Frank House selling Games, making money for my next trip to that mystic place at the other side of the planet where the roles of male and female are reversed with Hot Mommas knocking on my door at all time s of the day and night hoping to explore the boundaries of my wallet...

Three Thai beauties and a raving drunk

Holland, Amsterdam,
25-04-2010.

I feel a certain tension inside my head, the chaotic experiences of the reality of my latest trip to Thailand, trying to find the boundaries of a fucked-up alcohol addicted Farang male moving around an Asian realm that is mystic and mysterious to any given Western trained mind but a heaven for those of us, Farang males, who have dough in the pocket, money in the wallet...

Sex and booze is everywhere and at reduced prices, better quality sex for money than in ancient Europe where the whores treat you for what you are, the loser that has no wife or girlfriend to take care of you, the stupid Borracho who carries his hard earned Dinero to the women of the night...instead Thailand offers a whole army of undereducated, impoveriched pretty females who are willing to fullfill you wildest fantasies, sexual wed dreams turning into real orgies at bargain prices...no wonder so many Farang males keep coming back to the Land of the Smile, small miracle that so many sex starved white men go to extremes to be able to spend as much time as possible in Thailand's sex paradises like Patong Beach on Phuket, Shukumvit Road in Bangkok or nearby Pattaya to name just a few...

Words and images of Thailand race through my mind while I try hard to sell my games to three Spanish speaking beauties from Bhumipol's kingdom but being disturbed by the arrival of a very angry Rob who has no eye for these pretty Tilacs from the East, way to fucked-up with his latest fisticuffs in the park, more excitement among the Brotherhood of Westerpark Drunks and a worked-up Rob cycling like mad to my Plekkie at the tourist Hot Spot, The Anne Frank House, disturbing my good mood and my plans to ask at least one of these Thai ladies out for dinner tonight...hell in heaven I was seriously considering taking them all three out to the Kam-Yin downtown but this unshaven raving drunk does a good job scaring them off...

At least I sold nine games today after several days of real meagre Mandala business...maybe I should just save this money up for my next stint in Sex-Aplenty-Pattaya...get the notorious Knock-Knock-Knock on my New Star room again at all times of the day and night...

Tuk in full glory

Ay, yeah, let's get back to Tuk, my latest Thai flame - or maybe she was one of many latest flames during my last trip to Thailand - who loved to pose for me...this was in her room on Soi Bukaouw, cheaper room than mine in the New Star and bigger but I seem to remember not caring much about that at the time, I was much more interested in painting this highly attractive and pretty lady, enjoying her company to the max even though she could Yak-Yak-Yak like a Farang lady.

Tuk on her tummy

Painted in Amsterdam, april 2010 and based on some of the sketches I made of Tuk while spending time together in Thailand last winter.

Her underwear was actually red but I changed it to yellow for obvious purposes.

Acrylics on wood.

Su from the boulevard

"Me angry you much"...her words, not mine!!!
Aquarel on paper, basically a sketch from my sketchbook.

Prefabricated bullshit

Holland, Amsterdam,
20-04-2010.

Feel a bit like being locked up in the house, painting all day like I am in some sort of haze, or maybe back in the "ZONE", the zone That painters and autors talk about when they are filled with inspiration, full with words and images, it all has got to come out no matter what, one way or another...never mind the good weather outside, the queue at the Anne Frank House and the subsequent money I can make there...

No it is Tuk, Jiff, Joy and all the other countless Hot Mommas that walk the Pattaya boulevard hunting for Farangs, sex in exchange for a few notes of reddish-colored hunderd Baht notes - lady not have money, what can lady do? As the saying goes - Their bodies that gave me so much physical pleasure and their mouths that gave me so much Yak Yak Yak...It is them that rule the mental processes that go on inside my head

I still can sense and hear it all here in my house in Amsterdam, or when I am sitting in the sun at The Anne Frank House - not that there is much business going on with all the planes grounded - locking myself up in my house instead like a monk in a prayer cell, hearing their voices in my head...the prefabricated bullshit, lines they give every Farang boyfriend, a bit like the hastily scribed papers they have at hand when I see them in the internet cafes chatting with their Farang men in faraway Farang countries, lines that come down to only one thing...a bit of money to make ends meet...undereducated Thai females who are smart enough to make themselves a bundle on lonely and ungly Farang males who are too old to get female attention, let alone free pussy in Europe but living on a substancial pension....easy prey for Thai Hot Mommas...

If ever I do manage to sell all this colorfull art I will at least see some of all that dough back I brought to GO-GO bars and bordellos the world over, some undeclared money, black as coal, spending it while sitting in public places with a questionable reputation, listening to the lines of love coming from heavily lipsticked local females, prefabricated bullshit to rid me of my hard-won Dinero in exchange for female companionship, a few hours of steamy hot sex before they disappeared from my live but not from my fucked-up and booze and drug destroyed mind...

Getting close to my fifties, still alive but with my youthfull energy gone - maybe they took that TOO - and my mental neurons in a hopeless and chaotic state, my friends a bunch of alcoholics and druggies, spending my early mornings in the homeless centres drinking free coffee and eating the ocassional leftover free breakfast...

Tuk, the Nit Noi lady

Ay, yes, miss Tuk...hard to forget this lady who loved to pose for me during my latest stint in that all-time party place called Pattaya, though everything was Nit Noi - Little Bit - for Tuk...."me go make model for you litlle bit, than we make love little bit and after that we make eat food Mak Mak very much...
Yeah, this lady loved to eat, often getting up three or four times during the night to raid my fridge, leaving me at 06.00 h. early morning just to return 15 minutes later with chicken nuggets and two platic bags with warm soja milk....

Undeclared Money, black as coal

Holland, Amsterdam,
16-04-2010.

No more twenty Euro for a day's work at the animal farm for children where I do my volunteer's job as Magriet informed me last week, keep the shits from the social wellfare system here in Amsterdam happy, give them the idea I do something usefull for the local society, something to deserve the right to my Social dough...twenty Euro a day, black as coal - undeclared you know - and a 68 Euro bonus a month on top of the aforementioned social dough...

Not that I care a dog's shit, my situation as a person in charge was not really my THING anyway...skip a day and return to my old status as a traditional volunteer...more time at the Anne Frank House selling my games means less stress and more fun but probably with the same money saved up at the end of summer..sitting in the sun making and selling Mandala games, do my social duty telling these darned tourists the way, respond positively to their multitute op questions...where is the Flower Market, where is the Noordermarkt, where is the Anne Frank House - hey mon, you are standing in front of the fuckking place - another way of fullfilling the dream ideals of of an employee the Amsterdam social wellfare office for a semi-professional unemployed person like me...and make a small bundle in the process...

So back I am to my status as a traditional volunteer, back to one day a week and all the sunny days sitting outside Amsterdam's tourist hotspot Numero Uno, spotting the pick pockets for the neighborhood's finest and pondering about my fucked-up mind and crazy street life when not having customers or tourist questions to answer, distractions so wellcome to keep my Farang mind from going back to Pattaya, duties to fullfill that keep my crazy gray-colored brain mass from being invaded by the perils and harsh life style of Thailand's hardest working girls, these ladies of the night that shared my bed with me in the New Star Guest House for long and happy weeks, warm days and even warmer female Asian bodies to keep me from getting bored, good food at cheap prices and no constant begging for money from the Westerpark Brotherhood of Stupid Drunks - I somehow prefer the Knock-Knock-Knock of hungry Hot Mommas on my hotel room door to the annoying ringing of my house door bell by thirsty beer boozers from the park here in Amsterdam....

Yeah, well, the latter will be my lot I guess for the next nine or ten months or so...too bad indeed!!!

Hong Thong whiskey and Jonge Jenever

Acrylics on wood and based on my latest trip to King Bhumipol's Asian Realm

Lord Buddha with moustache

Lord Buddha with moustache,
Acrylics on wood and based on my latest stint in King Bhumipol's Asian realm.

Nang from Thailand

Nang from Thailand, one of the Hot Mommas I met during my latest trip to Thailand.

The final destination of a Hot Momma

Holland, Amsterdam,
13-04-2010.

Not even back a full week from my three months sojourn in the a dying king's realm, a king who is pining away while his followers are slashing it out in the streets of his beloved Bangkok, 21 dead and several hunderd wounded has resulted in an uneasy truce...or so it seems from my present location...

Off course I follow the going-ons minutely while I still have some sort of normalcy left in my Amsterdam life, no control over the events that always befall me in this ancient city where once old masters like Rembrant and Van Meer walked the cobble-stone streets and which nowadays has become my personal kingdom, cycling every day to the tourist hotspot numero uno, the Anne Frank House where my artwork is on display in some of the tourist shops around the Westerchurch, where I sell my funny little Mandala games in front of the notoriously long queue of Anne Frank devotees, people who have come from all over the world to see "my" city, who are willing to wait for hours outside the Anne Frank House - never mind the rain or maybe good sunshine, to get emotionally wrought-up by the sad story of that poor jewish girl who brought it all out to the world by keeping a diary...

To bad all these Hot Mommas who I hung out with mere days ago, are of poor decent, hardly any education when you are female and coming from a backward Isan village, have to sell your body in the Farang popular tourist resorts like Pattaya, Patong or maybe a quick detour to Shukumvit Road in Bangkok...

I am sure such a dairy would sell well though I ain't too sure wether or not people will line up in the Bangkok heat outside the GoGo bar where her body was on sale...maybe a short walk down Pattaya's boulevard where she spent the latter days of her Putaza carreer slowly pining away from a number of STD related infections, still sitting on a Farang's motorbike on the way to the all-time favorite shorttime hotel called the PS Guest House though, still having to make the dough to make ends meet despite her shitty physical condition...

Maybe a quick vist to the local Wat in Patong where our little heroine and numerous other Hot Mommas´ final destination played out in the form of a Thai creamation, no relatives or fat-bellied customers - the latter ones were probably getting themselves smashing drunk on cheap and ice-cold Chang in a local bar most likely unaware of a Female version of the ever popular `Baby, Light My Fire´ though a few old ladies of the night, former colleagues might attend the sorry affair...

Me...I wasn´t even aware of her crazy excistence...so sorry you poor creature of the night...dedicated to Miss Ohn

Hooded male

Acrylics on wood.

Indian Sadhu in Varanasi

Indian sadhu,
acrylics on wood

Full wallets and even fuller balls

Holland, Amsterdam,
10-04-2010.

Am I God's creation or just the end result - so far anyway - of an evolutionary progress, maybe one that is still in full throttle and is unpredictible in its outcome. If the latter is true then my actions don't bother much one way or an other...pretty much a waste of energy trying to cope with a mis-guided guilt complex about my sexual escapades with Thai Hot Mommas these last three months...no way I have to feel compassion with their wretched lives and the hardship they face trying to make a living, provide for the two or three babies back in their home village in the faraway Isan, selling their nubile bodies to Farang drunks from even further away Farang lands that they have very little knowledge about coming from undereducated families and never having had much of schooling themselves, sitting on Pattaya's boulevard with Theach-Yourself-English booklets that come at 40 Baht solo...

However if God is no myth but some sort of conceptual being inside the human mind that will turn out to be very real to whatever is left of my inmortal soul once my corporate body has turned to ashes due to cremation or else has rotten away in some nameless grave..well, yeah I admit I will have a serious problem on my hands then having to face a higher judge, having to try to convince something as incomprehensible as a God that my actions in this chaotic life of mine were merely inspired by the instincts He gave me, the instinct to procreate, the instinct to inpregnate as many females as possible no matter what the cost - forget about STDs or the HIV virus - just bang away as much as humanly possible...

Yeah, try to tell that to the catolic God who bans his followers from sex with multible partners, who wants his closer intimici like priests, nuns, freres, cardinals, and even the pope hgimself to stay loyal to him by abstaining from the physical pleasures of sex, a vow of abstinence for the faithfull who probably than will turn to pheadophily from pure physical and mental frustation...hard job I will have got on my hands after death me thinks....

Try to convince Lord Buddha who is rumoured to frown on paid sex though He himself lived the life of the fruitfull before finding his way to enlightenment after a prolonged period of meditation...yeah, well, not much of compassion or understanding there after all my non-marital affairs with his female faithfull followers in one of his more devoted realms - we are talking Thailand here in case that was unclear to you...

And what about the Islam God called Allah...don't wanna even go there...maybe something like InshAllah and lets leave it at that...

Once again I find myself in front of the Anne Frank House, sun in my face, tourist people all around me speaking a multitute of languages and once I get my mind back to working order, no more pondering about the sins in my life and the heavy price I might well have to pay when my demise is done and real, I start selling my games, more dough to commit sins in the Land of the Holy Thais and their semi-nymphomanic army of Hot Mommas, more Baht for hungry ladies of the night willing to satisfy oversexed Farang males with full wallets and even fuller balls...

Lord Buddha is still smiling

Holland, Amsterdam,
09-04-2010.

When you die, you cease to be!!! or so they say. Does that mean that everything I have experienced in this chaotic life of mine will cease to be as well??? Everything therefore will be obsolete when I cease to be??? Or is there a deeper meaning to the scheme of things happeninmg in my dark and crazy life??? If so it is still beyond me, no understanding of the how and why...

Nor are the reasons behind Ohn's messy death or the image of poor Moo pining away on her beach chair, the final stages of full blown AIDS upon her, her dead body soon to be transported by Songtheaw to the nearest Wat for creamation the Thai way, thousand of Farang men, young and old, fat and ungly with sweaty beer bellies or maybe handsome gym-enhanced Farang male muscles banging away at her Isan body...not understandable to my fucked-up Western trained Farang mind...

Never could she have imagined it was gonna be like that when she ran the dusty streets with the other kids in her native village near Buriram, a plaything, a sex slave for Western males hungry for Thai pussy, the Thai pussy they had heard so much about in the bars back home...her role in her life...a life that might well be over allready...and to what purpose...

Didn't it go the same way for poor Ohn who also came to Pattaya young at heart and body, a female hard body for sale with an undereducated Asian mind that was full of hope...maybe a handsome young Swede who would give her a couple of Leuk Kreung children in faraway Stockholm - a place she had hardly ever heard about - or maybe a millionaire's son from the fabled United States with a constant need for "me take care you good", but in the end never came about...the only real thing coming about in her life were the booze and Yaa Baa addictions that ravaged her once good looks and left her in a hopeless state of mind...

My mind keeps wandering back while I make my Mandala games in front of the notoriously long queue in front of the Anne Frank House, my first day back in the Amsterdam streets trying hard to sell my funny little self-made games, my one-man street business that will have to bring in the dough for next year's three months in King Bhumipol's crazy and mystical Asian realm...

And Lord Buddha???...well, he is still showing me his strange and incomprehensible smile that I can capture in my sketchbook but still find inpossible to understand...

A sudden wave of sadness

Thailand, Pattaya,
06-04-2010.

Watching a catwalk inside the Pattaya Festival shopping mall I feel a sudden wave of sadness engulving me, having a hard time to keep my tears from spilling all over my sun-tanned cheeks. It is all coming back to me, my emotional attachment with all these ladies of the night I have come to know so well over the long years of coming to King Bhumipol's Asian realm, the girls I picked up at the Marine Disco when I was much younger, all the Hot Mommas working the boulevard, walking up and down hoping for customers to pay the necessary bills - no social wellfare in the Thai Kingdom, just corrupt cops wanting their part of the lady's shorttime trade money - all their stories and hopes, their dreams of being taken to a far-away Farang land, some white-skinned sugar daddy taking care of them while they look after the inevitable Leuk Kreung babies...their downfalls and subsequent addictions to booze and drugs, Yaa Baa an easy way out of a working girl's misery...Meakong whiskey a good but short oblivion to mental distress...

A sudden wave of sadness caused by my emotional attachment to a lady like Miss Ohn whose messy death only a day before my arrival - was the devil himself playing tricks on me here? - caused so much havoc to my Farang mind, whose image I thought I saw, like she was showing herself to me one last time before passing over to the other side...letting me know all was well...wishing me good luck in this life time before my own inevitable end will come...

A sudden wave of sadness caused by my emotional attachment to a lady like Miss Moo whoso last image is still burned on my rectina, lying there on her beach chair, her frele and emaciated body pining away caused by countless STDs, the horrors of full blown AIDS ravaging what was once a great female body, her lustreless eyes looking at me without meaning or emotion, just waiting for the inevitable end and being fully aware of it...poor Moo who was always ready to stand up for herself, always ready for a fight, ready to face the whole world, wh*re tough to her very core but with a Chay - heart in Thai you know - bigger than my crazy mind can encompass, my sister in Thailand who is now facing a something even she can not win....if she hasn't gone to Kingdom-Come already...

Was it her death that just caused that wave of sadness, made my eyes water like the Niagara waterfalls, would make sence considering her avanched state of physical deterioration...or maybe an emotional attachment caused by the downfalls of countless female Thai connections over a long period of time, stories during long and nocturnal drinking sessions on the boulevard, countless modelling sessions in my room followed by bodily intercourse of the more intimate kind....sweaty and satisfied aftermath Yak-Yak-Yak, the sort of love talk after the s*x was good between two people who "clicked" to begin with.....

A good thing I am going home soon!!!

Police raids on Hot Mommas

Thailand, Pattaya,
05-04-2010.

With my time in this crazy Southeast Asian Big Party Place called Pattaya slowly coming to an end, contemplation is mine, getting pensive on the boulevard late at night about my trip while hungry Hot Mommas actively try to convince me a shorttime at bargain prices really is what I am looking for...they might even be right and Lord Buddha knows they need the dough with such few h*rny Farang males around at this time of year...the continuous Red Shirt rallies back in Bangkok aren't improving things much for international tourism in Thailand in general and surely not for the Hot momma trade in paticular here in the Big Male Farang Kingdom....

Police hassles late at night with ladies of the night running across Beach Road trying hard to escape police capture and a subsequent hefty 500 Baht fine for solicitation does not really improve their hungry status either...I watch from my comfortable seating place on the Dutch Bench while brown-clad officers of Thailand's finest run after Hot Mommas whose high-heeled platform shoes are no match for well-trained Thai cops whose copper minds are set on their monthly pay-off for an expensive motorbike, maybe some clothing money for the Miranoi - second wive in Thai - or just some spare cash in the police man's wallet....two police songthaews with bars in front of paneless car windows packed with slutily dressed young local women - many of which I recognise from my frequent walks up and down the boulevard, betray me that once again the coppers are the winners tonight and that their female contemporaries are getting even more hungry and desperate tomorrow after having paid the necessary fine and being released...just to return to their habitual nighttime activities....

The 7/Eleven across the road is full with scared females whose light-brown skins glow with the film of persperation caused by fearfull running on high heels, trying to look busy paging through Thai pin-up magazines, discussing the merits of different shades of make-up and lip stick but in reality having no Dinero to buy even a single cup of Java but having to sit it out inside the 7/Eleven untill Thailand's brown-clad finest decide enough is enough, our Songthaews are full, happy to know that tonight's fines will support their lavish life styles another couple of days...

Female hardship

Thailand, Pattaya,
03-04-2010.

The ladies on the boulevard are slowly getting hungry due to a serious lack of Farang clientele, with even those that hate my guts and will normally poke their tongue at me - something by the way I consider extremely funny and always produces a big smile underneath my big Farang nose, much to the annoyance of the aforementioned Hot Moomas, no free cold Leo to be gotten there though - will now actively pursue me...

For the old hand Farang population to Pattaya this is their golden time of year though...after all in the Land of the Blind One-eye is king which in this little male kingdom in Southeast Asia basically means they are the ones with the much needed cash in the Farang shorts - and something else as well packed in that garment, something that needs daily relieve by expert female atenttion that in these times of financial female hardship is easy to get...

Shoulder to shoulder they go on their popular platform shoes, empty wallets and perpired bodies but no time or dough to go back to their little rooms - even the 20 Baht for the motorbike taxi is difficult to get by - money needs to be made, no time to waste...the 14.00 h. to 17.00 h tradional break for many of these poor creatures of the night, a couple of hour back in their room for a much needed shower, a couple of hours of sleep during the heat of the day, a much wanted change of clothes...well, forget it...there might very well be a hot and h*rny Farang male about, a foreign male, old and cripled, fat bellied and only willing to depart with maybe 200/300 Baht but oh so needed for that empty wallet, that starving Hot Momma's belly...

Even the Ting-Tong Painter from Holland - crazy Moi - has stopped his daily afternoon painting sessions due to a serious painter's bloque or maybe just a dose of disinterest, getting tired of these Hot Momma invasions to my room, taking over the place as though it is they who rule the house, running off with my artwork even before I can even make a decent digital picture of it, empty walls stealing my inspiration, reducing me to yet another Cheap Charley old hand more in the mood for the usual evening chats with my Dutch contemparies on the Dutch Bench, all night drinking sessions in front of my hotel watching the going-ons in the Soi and the ocassional walk back to the boulevard for another Burmese sigar and a cold Ancha...but not all that keen on a Hot Momma rubbing her cr*tch up and down my knee, making soft-spoken sluty promises in my ear with their hot breath...absolutely unwanted hot and sweaty s*xercize...it just isn't in my vocabulary these days...

I don't even want to find a female body next to me in my room when next morning I wake up nursing a Ancha-induced hangover and yet again having ignored the nightly Knock-Knock-Knock on my door which in these days of bad and poor Hot Momma business, has become more and more persisitent...no big surprise there I presume but than I ain't the bloody Good Samatarian...just another Farang lost in Asia and soon to be back home....

The business in my Soi

Thailand, Pattaya,
01-04-2010.

Whenever I walk down the Soi Honey-Inn - the Soi where my hotel the New Star Guest House is located - I get solicited by the ladies from the Club Massage - or one of the many other massage parlours in my Soi - for simple massage, oil massage, all-body massage - well, I am reasonably sure you get the idea - for a meagre 100/200 Baht though I have been told that once inside the plain and simple massage plan will turn into something much more intimate with a couple of hunderd Baht on top of the original street price...no big surprises there though...

The ladies congregate early afternoon on the back of motorbike taxis taking their place outside on top of huge stone tables which during my breakfast walk down to the beach are being swept clean by the early arrivals and on my way back to the New Star late at night are covered with typical female paraphernelia like lipstick, make-up material, platform shoes - high heeled lady's shoes and very popular in this part of the world -, food remnants, empty Coca Cola bottles, Chang beer cans with the straw still sticking out, water bottles, Thai cartoons and the like...

Whenever a male Farang walks by the girls call at them the inevitable "hey, sexy man, come inside please, me make good for you" and whenever a Farang walks out of the place - usually with a big satisfied grin on his face - the motorbike cabbies will call out to them hoping for some transport business...

The numerous bars in this Soi are another source of high pitched female voices whenever poor Moi or any other unattached Farang male has the blo*dy nerves to walk by...a game of four on four with the poorly educated Isan female bar ladies whose English is nothing to write home about but surely sufficient to explain their desires to spend the night elsewhere, enjoying an overpriced lady's drink on the Farang acount...when the client's pockets have been professionally emptied of Thai dough, the bar fee paid for his nightly companion, the motortaxi cabbies will smell business once again...

The Intown Hotel across the Soi from New Star is busy too with male Farang guests dragging back the ladies of their choice, one after the other and I seriously wonder if that little blue wonder pill called Viagra - or maybe the cheaper Asian version called Kamagra - is included in the room price...any one way, when the ladies come back out, maybe half an hour or so later, unattached this time but with at least 500 Baht more in the lady's wallet, the motorbike cabbies will call out again...after all these ladies of the night have just made their money and are doubtlessly unwilling to walk back to the boulevard on their high heels...a brisking trade is in full swing here in my Soi 24/7 with me often sitting outside the New Star gulping down cold Ancha beer...

Sh*t, my beer is almost empty and once again I too will have to brave all the aforementioned "dangers" on my way to the Family Mart or the Seven/11 in this mad and lively Soi, for another cold Ancha, or maybe a cold Leo though they are 7 Baht more expensive...