Ich komme, komm bitte schnell!

Amsterdam, 24-04-2007. Everything is raedy now, Miss Poland you can come! I know she is on the way, i just had her on the phone, she is at the border now waiting for her conection to Amsterdam. I bought some nice clothes like a light colored jacket, a new blue jeans and i will put on the black shoes Keola gave me years ago and i rarely wear but when i do, everybody says they look good on my! Yeah, i know, i am and sound proabably quite excited about all this, but then i have been through quite a few big loves already in my life so i tend to believe i know when i am in love. Funny, i am getting older and had started to believe that Andrea from Kassel, who i met during another trip in Mexico was my last big love in this life, just felt i couldn`t handle this big love thing, too many emotions involved for such a closed personality ike me. However, after many women and over 7 years of holding them all at bay, just enjoying thje sex thing and the company i feel i have allowed finally to let another lady enter my life. I have decided to give her a good time here in Amsterdam at my side sacrificing a few days at the Anna Frank House in the process. Now i can only wait these final last hours before heading off to the railway station dressed in my fine new clothes to pick her upand hope she will enjoy her stay.

God.

Behold the eyes of God for he is watching!

Kochanie Brigit.

Amsterdam, 23-04-2007. Busy day today arranging everything for the expected arrival of Miss Poland, kochanie Brigit, cleaning the house especially the bathroom, i do want to make a good impression on her after all! Bought a new mountain bike as well so i can take her on rides through the city and beyond. In between i found time to visit the brothers in the park, have a coffee at the Schakel and a couple of free cups of soup at the Tweede Mijl, also known as the Tweede Kwijl < don`t ask me to translate, it would be difficult. Let it sufice to say the nickname refers to the free food!>. I even found a free hour to go over to Rob and ask him to take that crappy old race bike down from my house, i am sure he will be able to sell it some place, some-one so he can transform that money into cheap supermarket beer, the man is after all a hopeless alcoholic! When all the work was done i took my new bike out on a test ride through the city smoking a sigarillo on the way back in the park with the brothers. Needless to say they were by that time all pretty much wasted, drunk as skunks and high on all sorts of drugs!!!!!! Seriously wonder if i will ever be able to let that crazy life style totally behind me? Probably not but then they call me Shiva for a reason. Somehow i always seem to be able to return to my project, my trafels and my sports difficult as it might be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The plug or the cable.

Drag the plug, pull the cable.

El Senyor Poderoso, Dinero.

Amsterdam, 21-04-2007. Ich komme.... i read in my e-mail box today when i opened Yahoo.com. She is coming this polish love from me asking me in the same e-mail if she can borrow money, women cost money my dad used to say and sure enough he was right as i have found out a 1000 times over. Not really sure what to do about it, she needs money and i have it, but then all my alcoholic friends always ask for the dough of life and never bother to return El Senyor poderoso, maybe i should give her the money for her train ticket and pay for her expenses while she is here in my city. Not too bad a idea i would say!!! Not that i lack any money at the moment, my little one-man business at the Anna Frank House is still gonig strong like hell with over 90 Euros in my pocket when i left today and 24 games sold. Still running in the park nearly every day while i see the members of the Gang of Evil Brothers sitting in the sun and getting drunk as skunks on cheap Edah supermarket beer, their lifestyles are destructive and money always a problem. Just wonder how long it will take me to return to that lifestyle and hang out with again and again, paying for their cheap beers and the joints they so much like to smoke, maybe better i let Kristin have that money she asked for and hope i will eventually get it back.

Paradise.

Oh, how we have clouded paradise!

Mayke, as crazy as they come!

Amsterdam,20-04-2007. Not all that unexpected Mayke came over to my house last night, the woman really is as crazy as they can possibly come! Working at a second hand shop she came to bring me some blue jeans asking me 2 Euros a pair. Now that is not much for a good pair of jeans but has she forgotten all the bottles of white wine i bought for her whenever she comes over to watch a movie with me? Or the bag of grass she finished last week, the bag of grass that Haico forgot a few days earlier, which meant i had to buy some new pot for him! Whatever, all these people from the park constantly need money to finance their junky life style. And of course i have to listen to all her woes about Rody, her former boyfriend, hey you don`t like the bloke Mayke don t go over to his house anymore, i would say. However she is always so busy blabbering on she doesn`t seem to hear my comments, nothing new in that but fucking together is one thing that will never happen again between her and me!!! Sold 22 games at the Anna Frank House today, a hell of lot better as the 2 games i sold last wednesday or the 12 i sold last monday.

Relaxing with a Hollister, cigarillos and ice cold beer.

Amsterdam, 17-04-2007. Last night my college from the animal farm came over to help me out with my computer, installing my webcam and showing me how to do things with this highly interesting medium. The fact that he-Haico-is as gay as they come does not bother me much, the way i see it: the more gays in this world the better. It means less competion for me with the ladies!!! Nor do i care much about all these foreigners that seem to wanna settle down in this city, do hate the way some of them try to convince us, the dutch, we should embrace or at least accept their ways. Just let me live my own life and don`t bother me with yours pls!!! At least my little Mandala business at The Anna Frank House is goning all right, sold 17 games last sunday and 12 Mandalas yesterday, not bad for a couple of hours outside in the sun. The weather was good today but my volunteer job at the animal farm took to much of my energy to go out after i finish there, instead, as usual, i bought a Hollister and a pack of cigarillos and settle down to relax, the ice cold beer in my frigo that were left over from last night helped me to relax even more.

Global warming.

Amsterdam, 14-04-2007. The news on the radio just told me that today we had yet again another weather record in Holland with the temperature being at 26 degrees celsius. Is all this bull about global warming real or not, now i ask you? Maybe some big and huge companies that have more finances that the average third world country do some super big lobbying to make sure they can continue their Earth polluting shit and keep making the BIG BUCK!!! Sure as hell the directors and managers of these super firms have more money as i can possibly imagine, a garage full with Ferarries, a billion ton yacht and houses and summer places all over the place, maybe a private jet for their many business trips and curtisans at every major town!!! Yeah, mon, that is the life and it sure as hell is adicting as well, just as adicting as my sigarillos and cheap Albert Heijn Supermarket beer!!! When at 50 or 60 plus they will suffer from stress induced bad health, they will at least have the money for a private clinic while i will have to do with long waiting lists at the public local hospital where the staff is hopelessly overworked! Today i sold 17 games at the Anna Frank House, at least i got that.

Friday, the 13 th.

Amsterdam, 13-04-2007. "Today is friday the 13 th., man". Hans the Fat Slob told me when i arrived at the Anna Frank House this morning. I know he will go on about this topic for the rest of the day, especially so if his sales will be bad today. We are the only ones who can sell at the Anna frank House and have been for many years. Over these years i have come to know this crazy police informant inside out! His sexist behaviour towards the tourists , his nutcase blabbering and his hatred agianst marrocan pickpockets. I usually let him get on with his notorious bullshit, one ear in and the other out saying yes and no and hoping i say yes or no at the right time, just wanna sell my games and let him do his own business selling his Amsterdam paintings. His police contacts even come in handy at times. I actually had good hopes selling a whole bunch of games to a german school group of turks but in the end nada pasa. Still i went home with 40 Euro in the plus having sold 8 games and some bracelets. Yesterday was a no-selling day for me since i had my volunteer job at the animal farm. Also yesterday i had telephone- and e-mail contact with Brigit, my polish love who had just returned from Bankok.

Heardache.

Amsterdam, 12-04-2007.HEARDACHE SLOWS DOWN THE PASSING OF TIME!!!

Sand fleas.

Amsterdam, 11=04-2007. I feel real happy running in the park among all these trees that carry the first green leaves of the spring, blossom and the smell of it invades my nostrils, my heart is pumping but in a good way. Back home and relaxing with a cigarillo and an ice cold beer i get a phonecall from Brigitte waiting for her plane back home to berlin, in Bangkok. She is head over heels in love with me, i made an impression on her all right, i would not be surprised to see her here in amsterdam for long!!! She did complain of bites from sand fleas, probably a result from our love-making sessions on the deserted beaches of Koh Samet we found. Sold 13 games at the Anna Frank House today though the weather was a bit cloudy.

an aluminium bisquit can with artificial wings

Amsterdam, 09-04-2007. Allthough my mind is still inside this alu bisquit can with artificial wings flying up there at 10 km. height on its way to my beloved amsterdam, i still manged to get up early enough to cycle out to the Anna Frank House my battered old leather mandala suitcase strapped to the back of my old velo. The inevitable queue was long as always but that usually means good business for me, 14 games today i sold jetlag or no jetlag! The park was full with people but apart from Richard who instantly bugged me for free Thai whiskey, no that many professional drunks around for a change, good for me, no temptations!

Early visit.

Amsterdam, 08-04-2007. I did promise Rob this small bottle of local Thai whiskey when i phoned him yesterday so i suppose i have no rights to complain when he rang my bell early this morning. I was still in bed but in the proces of getting up and being curious about the latest happenings during my absence i let him in. While i made coffee for myself and gave Rob a cold beer from the fridge i felt happy with the rays of sunlight coming through my window, this means i can be off to to the A. Frank House selling my Mandala games. In the end i managed to sell 19 games, one of them to the Ambassedor of India and his family. Not a bad start of the summer.

back home from Thailand.

Amsterdam, 07-04-2007. Returning to a sort of sunny Amsterdam and feeling quite happy this morning, i take it all for granted!!! Not that that is all that dificult after my little love affair with miss Poland, Brigitte!!! I can still feel it in my mind and my cock is still suffering from all the hard work it had to do the last 2 weeks or so, not that i have any complains, mind me!!! i am after all pretty much adicted to sex, matter of fact i let this adiction rule my actions and can take drastic decisions just to get a juicy pussy into my bed, no matter what. Being back home is being back in the old scene, the scene of alcoholics and druggies, the people i share my life with here in Amsterdam, dificult as it might seem and probably is, it still is my life here in this nice little city. However, whenever i come home i feel like being reborn. The enormous difference between my life here and when i am on the road is staggering and beyond my comprehension, where i get the amazing luck from to be able to do all this is also something i cannot understand and i have since long given up trying to!!! Just take things the way they come is my motto these days. Suspect the energy that this trip has given me will most likely linger on for a while and keep me active, the chickenfarm stuff and my memories of Miss Poland will keep invigorating me for some time as yet. Yeah, mon, i had a great trip and feel happy about it!