Monday, April 21, 2014

Miss Endu in Bangkok

                                           Miss Endu in Bangkok
                                                    Me and Miss Endu in Bangkok

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Thailand sketches





Cookie merits

Amsterdam, 15 april 2014.

Fifty stories up I have to go in the dusty corners of my crazy and rambling mind, senilic and suffering from constant turmoil, rambling memories going Honky-Tonky creating chaos and mental nuttiness, fifty stories and counting to find a semblance of the true me...

Rusty stairs with several rungs missing, a testimony to old age approaching fast and furious,a lot here in these dark twilight zones is seriously amiss, the air stinking of corrupting rot, empty files once full but now eaten away by imaginary cockroaches, too much Thai moonshine wisky and cheap beer, no bodyguards to stop me from entering my own private domain, the part of me I hate and fear at the same time...

My skin is clammy, my pulse rapid, rapid and shallow breathing, I am in shock, I can't feel my fingers...

I have to find the answer, it is why I have come up here despite my growing despair and angst, why buy cookies and offer them to my younger customers, never mind whether or not Mum gives them five cherished Euros to buy a game, a child's smile should be ample reward, but No I keep thinking about that daily one Euro disappearing into that Appie Heyn supermarket cash dispender, nothing to win here but the Gran Sonrisa of international kids waiting to see the world famous Achterhuis...

Brightly colored cycle gear and slightly overweight, an expensive Tour De France Bicicleta I wish I had to cash to buy, the free time to tour, the owner cocksure walking over, a green five note between beefy fingers...no what does he want looking like he knows all and everything about Pauvre Moi...?

"Hey Mon you gave my daughter a sinamon cookie the other day when we was waiting in this freaking line, now she keeps talking about your games, give me a red one okay?" "I had to cycle 45 kilometers back to Amsterdam to buy one for her, so don't disappoint me, okay Mon".

Ah yes now I know, there is merit in cookies after all...

    

Monday, April 7, 2014

Borrowed money

Amsterdam, 06 April 2014.

Moving back into the twisted laberinth of the sub-conscious dusty corners of my fucked-up mind I find no solace or understanding for my self choosen path of life, in fact I see very little but shadows, the glow of sigarettes in dark alleys and unlit entrances of bars of a dubious nature where female faces with too much make-up that hide in vain years of boozing and drug abuse, their bodies clad in shining spandex that leave little to the imagination or their choosen profession try to wave me inside...

Laberinths of black Sois where the neon lights are the only thing that shine brightly advocating sex and booze, ladies and Khatoeys alike for the testosterone driven Farang males, fancy names like Honey a Go-Go, The Dollhouse, Amazon Girls and likewise imaginary shit having come out of the gray recesses of a madman´s drive to acquire the dough of the Western male sex addicts...

Western sex addicts who go to extreme lenghts to get themselves between the brownish colored legs of the Sisterhood Of Isan Born Females, no pure and unselfish life here but the desire for debauchery abundance of the Asian type, young and sensual, willing to fullfill a man´s every secret thought without even having to mutter them out loud...

It all comes back with a vengefull clarity while I look up in the green rheumy eyes of that old fart, as always dressed in his short dark green corduroy pants, big pauch falling over his belt, angry and desperately wanting to know `where is your neighbor, Old Hans` yeah, my neighbor here at the numero uno tourist spot in downtown Amsterdam where, on this sunny spring day, I have once again started selling my funny little Indian Games, plenty of customers but also plenty of neighborhood people wanting back money that has gone down the butterfly trap in Thailand...

Not me borrowing the darned euro cuurency from bored pensionados in Mokum´s centre, mind me, no way... but Beaucoup D´Argent borrewed by Old Hans, the specialist of Amsterdam humor - or so he thinks - and presently gagging on liitle green erection pills in Kho Samui pouring down the neighborhood´s pensions in a never ending butterfly trap of the Siam female gender...     

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Feeding Snowwhite

 Snowwhite, our latest baby goat at the Westerpark petting zoo, still needing her regular bottle of milk...after all she is only one week old as yet.